I Put the Bed on the Front Lawn

I took a house sitting job for this guy Georgie. When I arrived at his house, he was showing me around, introducing me to his dog, when I realized that I knew this guy from somewhere - and not just the creepy picture he posted on his craigslist ad. This guy was the valet parking attendant that parked my car last weekend. This was the same dude that MOVED MY SEAT UP when he drove my car. I tell you, nothing, NOTHING, revs my engine more than when valet attendants move my seat and don't put it back.

Revenge is my middle name. Georgie left for the weekend and I got to work. I moved everything in his house from its original place to somewhere else. I put the dining room table in the bedroom. I put the bed on the front lawn. I put the toilet paper in the refrigerator, I put the dishes in the bathroom. I was on a mission. The recliner went in the garage, the microwave went in the stove and the bookshelves I turned upside down.

I didn't get paid, obviously. But I also refused to put anything back.